Scottish Delights

By now I’m totally familiar with Scottish culinary delights, so as you can probably imagine I’ve been cooking a lot myself. Top of the list is the national dish of haggis, which for the unfamiliar is a combination of spicy sausage and oatmeal boiled in a sheeps stomach, and tradionally served with neeps (turnips) and tatties (potatoes). To be fair it aint that bad, however the vegetarian haggis tasted like spiced birdfeed and corn chunks wrapped in a condom.


The Scottish also have a penchant for fried food, and are the originators of the deep fried mars bar. Adding to the traditonal kebab, your drunken late night feed options include deep fried ice-cream, pizza, pineapple rings, pickled eggs, snicker bars, and bananas, and all come served with a free cardiac arrest. Another favourite (just in case you cant decide between the kebab or pizza) is, and you may have guessed by now, a kebab meat pizza. If you feel like some international flavours there are also many generic Chinese resturants, which encompass anything slightly asian. The first meals listed on many of the menus are burger and chips, fish and chips, pizza and then the classic sweet and sour chicken….with chips.

Aussie Day

In what seems like only the other day, it was Australia Day, and could there have been a more fitting day to have farewelled Marky doodle. Without a body of water to 'celebrate' in we were obliged to stay indoors, so it was off to the Walkabout for the lot of us wearing traditional aussie flag capes. The pub was jamming and it was a top night out, but once it closed it was well and truly time for some drunken singstar back at the flat. After Mark decided to make friends with every cop he saw on the walk home, and we made the mandatory stop off for Leah to get her hot chips drowned in a bucket load of mayo, we finally got home in order to witness the worst singing imaginable (at least I tried), and to see Magda's intimate moves with a microphone. Yah for karaoke!






Use your pinky idiot.













Let me introduce you to my new friends, Constable Care and Sargent Moe.













mmm mayo














Is she sleep singing?

Scottish Road Trip

With Mark returning from his European tour of women, we hired a car and set off with my lassie Magda and flatmate Leah for a lap around Scotland. After a beautiful drive through the highlands and a night in the sleepy town of Fort William, we stopped at the scenic setting of the highland rail, which for all you harry potter fans (I know you exist), was the setting for the flying car being tailed by a train in the third? film. From there we bypassed Hogwarts and the flying car and into the Cairngorm Mountains, Aviemore to be precise, and ridiculed the Australian like ski fields, before we all decided marks face needed some cooling.

Cooling marks face

The Highland Rail

We left the mountains and decided to make a massive drive to the very top of the Scottish mainland to John O’Groats. A whole hour or so later we arrived and seemingly doubled the population of the town. We had initial intentions of getting the ferry across to the Orkney Islands, but after being advised that were massive storms predicted for the next week that would leave us stranded on the island, we gave it a miss and moved on. The next exhilarating town was Thurso, where the only place to stay was hostel above a chippy, which consequently meant each room was pungently fragrant and whose owner, much to Magda’s irritation, was of the vocal and highly informed opinion that all drunken violence was due to Polish immigration.

On the way back down to Inverness we stumbled across a nice looking beach and ventured across the dunes to leave a supersized NSBH trademark in the frozen sand. After admiring our artwork for a few hours we wondered back only to discover a blaringly obvious sign at the start of the track warning that the beach was in fact radioactive. For the rest of the drive down to loch ness and during a wee spot of nessie spotting, I couldn’t help but wonder if I was ever going to have children, and more importantly, what kind of awesome supernatural powers would I acquire?

Having planned the driving roster to perfection, MARK drove us (now minus Magda) to the Glen Fiddich distiller to go on a free whisky tour and tasting. I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly... Having had leah and marks shots, the journey over and into Aberdeen was a little blurry, but to be honest I don’t think I was missing all that much. Following the eastern coast south we strolled around the romantic Dunnottar Castle, before we arrived at Leah’s hometown of Arbroath for a taste of their renown and unique ‘smokies’ (rather tasty smoked haddock) and to view the spectacular Abroath Abbey ruins (see photo). To conclude the trip we dropped in to the well known town of St Andrews, and had a random night out with some posh English uni students and dreamed of a round of golf on the famous course.

A magical place: the Glen Fiddich distillery.

Dunnottar Castle

Arbroath Abbey

Edinburgh Hogmanay

For new years 07 we got tickets to the Edinburgh Hogmany, a large festival with music, amusement tides, ice skating, fireworks and drinks in the old part of the city. Whilst mark and I wondered around the city and checked out parliament house, the weather turned from crap to worse and when the gale force winds started to blow ever speaker stacks on stage, the event was sadly cancelled. With mark finding enjoyment in competing with the storm to see who could produce the most wind, we picked out a pub that happened to be full of other aussies and settled in for the night. When the new year clocked over without much of a hoohar, we left for a house party and somehow actually managed to find it. As we walked in we clumsily stepped over a number of passed out quitters, and mingled with some seriously pissed people. At one stage a rather happy young chap, who had that unfocussed where the hell am I look, started to give mark a nice little leg rub thinking it was the leg of the girl sitting next to him. Mark of course, didn’t tell him to stop.




The umbrellas didn't stand a chance with marks windy onslaught.

The Storm Drifts In

Would have been nice to see fireworks off the Castle

If only cameras could show wind

Not a bad location for a gig.

The fratellis were gonna headline.

Looking sharp

We woke up in some strange place with some of the people we meet up with during the night, and headed off to the Forth River just outside of Edinburgh to witness a strange Scottish new years tradition. For some reason, a bunch of people dress up in an assortment of costumes and traditional attire, parade down the streets and then brave the cold and plunge into the cold waters of the river near the Firth bridge(see photos below). I’m sure there’s a story behind. I might even go google it now.

Freeeeeedooooommmm

Ok so it probably seems a little ridiculous to be blogging about events from last year, but buggar it, its my blog and I’ll blog what I want to. The plan is to do a whole lot of crap blogs to get up to date, eventually, and then blow you away with super amazing blogs and keeping up to date.


Right here we go, so a fair while back, I got an email from out of the blue from marky mark advising me he was arriving in Glasgow two days after Christmas. I unpacked my drinking liver, stocked up the fridge, took a few days off work and then had an awesome few hours at Glasgow airport waiting for him to arrive whilst he got detained in Heathrow by customs who confiscated his contraband. The following day we allowed my flat mate Alana to tag along, and hoped on a train to Stirling, a city with perhaps the most blood drenched history in Scotland and a castle to rival Edinburgh’s. We stayed in a beautiful hostel in an old church and visited the William Wallace monument, saw glances of the castle through a wall of fog, went drinking in a cemetery and learnt highland dancing with some Japanese students back at the hostel.





















Big Willy Wallaces Sword





















Stella in the Street


















Alana in a foggy cemetry.....creepy

Not a particularly exciting view, but the scene of many thousands of Scottish and English deaths all in the name of freeeeedoooooomm

Christmas

Believe it or not, on the 25/12/06 it was christmas day in Glasgow, and I woke up early to discover that santa obviously didn't get my change of address notification. With a tear in my eye, I realised I would have to buy my own socks and undies this year. For consolation I opened the box of goodies my parents had sent over, and magically, they contained a years supply of socks and undies. 10 seconds of happiness latter I was away to spend the day with Mikey's family. We had a loverly afternoon feast, and thanked dear 8 pounds 6 ounces baby jesus, new born, not even spoken a word yet, for the day. It was then off to the local nightclub 'word up' to boogie the night away.

Going Out Out

Scenes of Glasgow

Wallabies

With a heavy night under my belt, it was with much difficulty that i met up with a few footy mates at 10am to get the train to Edinburgh to watch the Wallabies take on Scotland. With aboot 45 blokes along for the trip we managed to take out a whole carriage, and the bottles of buckies, stubbies and up kilt flashes were flowing as thick and fast as the glasgwegian accented aussie insults. After much more pre-match drinking we all stumbled into murrayfield stadium to watch the wallabies smash the hapless scots 44 - 15. As no beers are permitted in any stadiums in scotland it was with great thirst that broke into the nearest pub through the fire exit after the game to refuel. When it was time to move onto the next pub, I somehow decided that I had brought a bag with me. I retardedly started wondering around the pub searching for my lost bag and managed to rustle up half the team to help me try find it. After searching every nook and cranny, and with some blokes understandably starting to get a little annoyed, it suddenly dawned on me that my bag was in fact safe and sound back at home. Unable to think up a decent excuse for my stupidity I embarrasingly fessed up and got the ribbing of a lifetime.

When Aitken's in Town

It seems whenever Sarah's is in town, or vice versa, we invariably go mountain walking - usually through mud, rain and mist. After meeting up for a brief excursion in Edinburgh, it was back to my home town for a visually stunning tour of Glasgow and a pint. Our plan was to go for a day trip to Arran Island, a place described as the ‘whole of Scotland in one island’ for a wee day trip. Getting the first ferry we set off on an 8mile walk through the lovely mountains with the intent of getting the last bus back to get the last ferry home. Of course this target was missed, and instead of getting the last bus back we had a fantastic 8mile walk in darkness, which was only partially relieved by hitching the last mile. Now some might say this target was missed due to poor planning, others that 4pm is a little early to be a last bus, but having done the post event analysis, I can conclude that our miscalculation can only be put down to the leisurely walking pace of a certain somebody with size 6 inch feet. Nevertheless, the extension on our day trip did allow us to get another walk to a waterfall in, albeit through cold and rain.
















Above and Bellow: Arran's scenery





































Diminutive feet doing their best

Drinkies in the flat

Flat Mate Profile

Leah:

Nickname: Princess Leah
Age: 22.... I think, probably wrong though
Nationality: Scot
Hobbies: clothes collecting, boy collecting, planning a night out 4 weeks in advance
Skills: giggling, chat, going out out
Likes: covering room in christmas lights (still), playing madonna loudly at 3am to newly arrived flatmates
Dislikes: silence, people changing their minds, fatties & ugglies
Fav Sayings: whats the chat, pure like, its stinkin






















Alana:

Nickname: vegemite thief
Age: 19
Nationality: brisbanian
Hobbies: serving me beer (see above photo), collecting one pound coins on her ceiling, putting clothes inside out on her coathangers
Most likely seen…. in the papers supporting womens choice, at work
Skills: serving me beer, thieving vegemite, being a good laugh
Likes: leaving glasses of milk out until it becomes solid, collecting corks
Dislikes: washing up, the landlord, the above photo, scotland



Luis:

Nickname: Dancin Man

Age: 26
Nationality: espanol
Hobbies: job hunting, watching friends (the tv show that is), running
Skills: looking sexy in tight running pants, laughing like a monkey, dancing up a storm
Likes: english translator program, omlettes, turning the heat up so high his room becomes a sauna
Dislikes: leaking roofs, glasgow, working at guru nightclub
Favourite thing in room: his bright red bucket (for both roof and oral leakages)

My Flat

After overstaying my welcome at the wonderful Crawford family, i finally found myself a flat and moved into the city of Glasgow. This all happened a good 3months or so ago, but I may as well mention it now. So if anyone wants to send me stuff - i'd quite like some vegemite, postcards and a new puppy (make sure you leave breathing holes in the box), here's where to send it:

Flat 3/1
144 Woodlands Road
Glasgow
G36LF
UK















Room with a view
















Where the ladies get lucky

I LOVE our wallpaper